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The Self-Coaching Corner: From Objective to Decision – January 2024

To provide meaningful questions to reconnect, step back and open new perspectives in the complex world around us.  We want these questions to help you in your own coaching with your colleagues and even with your peers.

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The question of coaching for the month

(with a self-evaluation questionnaire below):

If you were in the other person’s shoes, how would you resolve the situation?

What can question ourselves when confronted with a challenge? How do we prepare ourselves to influence a situation or rebuild mutual trust as a necessary step? (e.g.: an excellent idea that doesn’t work; a project that’s hit a bump in the road)?

It’s certainly a question that will prompt us to show empathy, be more attentive to the needs of our colleague and foster collaboration.

Explore each other’s strengths and build trust

To start exploring possible solutions, how can we understand the other person’s emotions and perspectives? How can we better discover each other’s strengths, to understand each other’s needs and interests?

What could improve exchanges and build trust, so that together we can find the keys to the challenges we face, and come up with a win-win solution?

Improving communication and collaboration

Such a question also gives us an opportunity to think about ways of improving communication and collaboration:

  • Clarify situations, address concerns.
  • Collaborate with your counterpart to find a win-win solution.
  • Identify key challenges and uncover new possibilities we hadn’t even considered.
  • Examine the pros and cons of each option, building on each other’s strengths to learn from each other.

Promoting collaboration through listening and openness

By putting ourselves in the other person’s shoes, we can develop our ability to listen and be open to others. Because, while in some situations it may be necessary to find common ground or make compromises, it becomes important to be open to other points of view by letting the other person have their say and, if necessary, accepting to adjust our position by listening to the other person. This openness contributes to reaching mutually beneficial solutions.

Communication skills self-evaluation questionnaire

Putting yourself in the other person’s shoes also means getting to know yourself better. That’s why, to help you better assess your communication skills, we’ve included this short questionnaire from our Self-Coaching Kit User’s Guide.

If you’ve answered “No” or “Sometimes” several times, anchor yourself in the things you’re already doing well. Next, set a real intention to move forward and identify something you’d like to do differently in the next week (e.g., letting others speak before you, asking questions for better understanding in a meeting).  Think about your intention out loud. Team up with others to dare to act.  And don’t forget to give feedback on your changes. Because experience without reflection is repetition.

Now what would you do:

If you were in the other person’s shoes, how would you resolve the situation?

Be bold. Write the question down. Share it with someone you trust. Ask this question to a colleague. Or try it during your next mentoring session.

This question is designed to help you envision the future, one step at a time. You can find this question in the Self-Coaching Starter Kit – from Objective to Decision. The kit equips you with a tangible coaching cycle to find solutions and to move forward. It is now available on our website